Perhaps it is time
for you and I to begin a conversation about presidential erotica,
on account of many of the other things we have been discussing have
perhaps fallen somewhat flat as of late. Specifically, it is time for us
to discuss the implications of the recently leaked autoerotica of former
president Bush.
More specifically, given that it is clear (1) that the attached bodyscape (2) above, seen in context as the former president of what you might call the U.S, cannot perspectivally be in fact that of the president himself despite the implication of his hairline, this argument primarily proven by the placement of the mirror vis a vis the viewer (3), we must therefore conclude that the painter is one the same as the figure in the mirror while the figure ahead of the painter is in fact not the body of the painter himself but rather that of another man (4). This begs the question, then, of who this other man could perhaps be, to which I have no clear answer save the clear information of height and minimal number of arms (6). The very point being, of course, that what is initially seen as another inclusion into the growing catalog of political autoerotic imagery (9) is in fact implication of another instance of homophobic politicians involved in the sort of homosexual affairs we find so fascinating. All of which opens to questions about the truth, not only of the "man behind the curtain," as I chose to dub this non-Dubya figure, but likewise w/r/t the similarly leaked bath picture, as well as why, as has yet to be ascertained by so-called journalists, the president was emailing such paintings to his sister in the first place.
1. Statement utilized as colloquial for a conjecture assumed to be accepted upon its presentation, rather than any implication of a priori obviousness
2. Self-generated nomenclature, please imitate and disseminate in order to further fellate the ego of yours truly
3. Which is to say, the mirror in question is clearly facing the painter and viewer of the scene in question dead-on, as the light reflected shows cleanly the full face of President No. 43, while the figure displayed most prominently in said scene is down and to the right of said mirror, the face of said figure being both entirely too much below and likewise entirely too much to the right of said mirror to be in fact a reflection of said face of said figure
4. Gender taken as an a posteriori assumption (5), but the assumption is open to debate
5. No puns intended in this sentence, though they are appreciated.
6. At least one at time of painting, the other assumed by Y.T. (7) to be either in the act of opening or closing curtain of assumed shower scene, assumed because the realism of the painting in question has yet to be questioned (8), yet the arm could equally be engaged in an act of onanism popular in such "bathhouse scenes" or even be nonexistent, and likewise legs are equally unknown.
7. See footnote 3
8. Which is to say, it could very well be a piece of abstract art, one in which I only subconsciously chose to perceive a shower scene between President 43 and mysterious shorter gentleman
9. Q.v. Anthony Weiner, et al.
More specifically, given that it is clear (1) that the attached bodyscape (2) above, seen in context as the former president of what you might call the U.S, cannot perspectivally be in fact that of the president himself despite the implication of his hairline, this argument primarily proven by the placement of the mirror vis a vis the viewer (3), we must therefore conclude that the painter is one the same as the figure in the mirror while the figure ahead of the painter is in fact not the body of the painter himself but rather that of another man (4). This begs the question, then, of who this other man could perhaps be, to which I have no clear answer save the clear information of height and minimal number of arms (6). The very point being, of course, that what is initially seen as another inclusion into the growing catalog of political autoerotic imagery (9) is in fact implication of another instance of homophobic politicians involved in the sort of homosexual affairs we find so fascinating. All of which opens to questions about the truth, not only of the "man behind the curtain," as I chose to dub this non-Dubya figure, but likewise w/r/t the similarly leaked bath picture, as well as why, as has yet to be ascertained by so-called journalists, the president was emailing such paintings to his sister in the first place.
1. Statement utilized as colloquial for a conjecture assumed to be accepted upon its presentation, rather than any implication of a priori obviousness
2. Self-generated nomenclature, please imitate and disseminate in order to further fellate the ego of yours truly
3. Which is to say, the mirror in question is clearly facing the painter and viewer of the scene in question dead-on, as the light reflected shows cleanly the full face of President No. 43, while the figure displayed most prominently in said scene is down and to the right of said mirror, the face of said figure being both entirely too much below and likewise entirely too much to the right of said mirror to be in fact a reflection of said face of said figure
4. Gender taken as an a posteriori assumption (5), but the assumption is open to debate
5. No puns intended in this sentence, though they are appreciated.
6. At least one at time of painting, the other assumed by Y.T. (7) to be either in the act of opening or closing curtain of assumed shower scene, assumed because the realism of the painting in question has yet to be questioned (8), yet the arm could equally be engaged in an act of onanism popular in such "bathhouse scenes" or even be nonexistent, and likewise legs are equally unknown.
7. See footnote 3
8. Which is to say, it could very well be a piece of abstract art, one in which I only subconsciously chose to perceive a shower scene between President 43 and mysterious shorter gentleman
9. Q.v. Anthony Weiner, et al.
Update: Oh
shit, I just looked at the painting again and realized that Bush
probably doesn’t follow the rules of Euclidean geometry. My whole theory
falls apart there. Non-euclidean geometry, the dread ruler lying in the
water- the message here is clear: Ph'nglui mglw'nafh Cthulhu R'lyeh
wgah'nagl fhtagn!!
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